Tears and conversation

03/11/2025 18:28
flamingsword: We now return you to your regularly scheduled crisis. :) (Default)
[personal profile] flamingsword
When was the last time you cried in front of another person?

For me it was on the phone with my friend [personal profile] nyyki when Ghost decided to go basically no-contact with me in the beginning of September. (In my estimation, phone conversations absolutely count as crying in front of someone.)

I’m over the emotional immediacy of the feelings of bewilderment, abandonment, and betrayal. I still miss him and I really desperately miss the kitties sometimes, but I can deal with having been lied to about whether we would stay friends. I can deal with having given someone six months of space and had them instead of telling me that that wasn’t enough space just decide to cut contact completely. I can deal with not understanding why Ghost decided to stop growing or changing as a person. It’s not ideal, and I don’t deal well with not knowing important things that affect my life, it makes me neurotic and overthinky but it’s … well, it’s not fine, but it’s more disappointing and aggravating at this point and less the emotional equivalent of a freshly-broken toe. (Broken toes also make me cry. I can bear bad fibro flares like an adult, but broken toes make me tear up like an overstimulated toddler when something feels unfair.)

Thanks for sticking with me so far.

Relevant YouTube link behind the cut for folks whose screen readers may still be borked: Read more... )

So really: when was the last time you cried in front of someone? Feel free to comment here or to DM me or to ping me on other contact platforms. Anywhere you like, if you want to have a meaningful discussion about who you are, or what we have in common, etc..
cimorene: A small bronze table lamp with triple-layered orange glass shades (stylish)
[personal profile] cimorene
I finally managed to find good information about getting rust off of a cast iron woodstove by using Marginalia Search Engine, a specialty search engine that is intended to resurface the "old web" of private websites and bulletin boards and stuff instead of SEO and corporate slop.

A few years ago in the winter when we were using the cast iron woodstove sometimes, someone (me) uhmmmmm absent-mindedly left some candle holders sitting on top of it with candles in them and those included ones carved out of solid blocks of pink rock salt (hideous, they belonged to my MIL, who was addicted to candles. Why didn't we just get rid of them? We hated them. Natural aversion to throwing things away. We have since thrown them out). So it turns out that ummm the candles completely liquefy if you do that and then light a fire in the stove, and they like cause the salt to run and melt onto the surface of the wood stove and salt is bad for cast iron. So. Big rust spots.

And the rust spots have got worse with time, because when it first happened and we tried to get them off, we tried with normal google and duckduckgo searches and got no better advice than sandpaper and steel wool. We only managed to get a tiny bit of the rust off and determined that getting it all off would have taken about 5000 hours of hand-sanding. Since that was not a worthwhile proposition, we left it that way for another year.

So anyway, I tried Marginalia a month ago or something, and it only took a few minutes to unearth a thread about restoring cast iron woodstoves on an old-fashioned bulletin board on "finishing.com, the home of the finishing industry". It's straight out of the internet 20 years ago. And the information was MUCH better!

  • WD-40 softens rust

  • wire brushes, not sandpaper or sandblasting (although industrial, like, having the stove ripped out and taking it to someone who will sandblast it is the nuclear option if it's completely covered in rust everywhere)

  • wire brush attachments for power drills


That was all the info we needed! WD-40 never seemed stinky to me when I was using it on door hinges and stuff, but when you spray it over the visible rust on a wood stove it is noticeable, though not TERRIBLE; it smells kinda like you're in an auto shop, but not in the middle of the car part. Like by the entrance.

You can get visible change on small rust spots with a handheld wire brush. A few hours on two days with the drill attachment has seemed to do the majority of it. It's very hard to work in eye protection goggles and a high filtration mask though. I have to stop, lift the glasses to look, then lower them and start again every minute or so. We are not planning to repaint the spots that have been taken back to the silvery iron, according again to the advice on this bulletin board. Apparently lighting a fire after the WD-40 is already going to be stinky enough and the paint would be worse. You can get protective stove polishes of some kind apparently.

This stove is a Jøtul 3 Classic cast iron woodstove, in a traditional 19th century style. It's completely inappropriate for this 1950 modern-style house. The expected stove in the livingroom is (and no doubt was) a masonry stove, which is much better at heating an area because the ceramic conserves heat and releases it gradually. The form of masonry stoves, which are of course built on-site, was typically streamlined in the years after this house was built. Nowadays you can't build them yourself anymore and that makes them more expensive, so somebody probably replaced the original one when it failed with this cast iron stove perhaps in the 1980s, which was the last time this model was made. But crucially, although a woodstove is completely inappropriate to the house and less functional, there were and are woodstoves that are more minimal and modern in form and they could've just got one of those. But nope.

Anyway, we can't afford a masonry stove like, ever, but our ambition is to replace this woodstove with a Porin Matti, a cheaper alternative to a masonry stove that is still slightly better at retaining heat than a cast iron stove, and which also (a) was in popular use in 1950 and (b) looks similar to the style of masonry stoves typically found in our type of house. These only cost about 2500€ (not counting labor), in contrast to masonry stoves which are typically over 8000€ not counting labor (and requiring much more labor because the mason has to build it on site out of blocks and tiles). We would've been able to buy one this year probably if we hadn't had this broken sewage pipe issue, which ended up costing around 10k. (We had previously earmarked that money, an inheritance from my great-uncle who died recently, for restoring the outer front door and maybe a stove; but the last of it got used on the plumbing instead.)
pensnest: Photo of me with face painted squirls (My squirly face)
[personal profile] pensnest
Back from Convention!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iNusMa-FQo0&list=PLh34tOVCkOjNbBaM8AqvKbIECeg81TU7F&index=13

Despite a slow start—with the first of three trains on Friday being cancelled ten minutes after it was supposed to have set out—it was a good weekend. My chorus did not win any trophies, but we upped our score by 2.4 percentage points, which is *hard* to do when you're already at over 70%. We were the second most improved chorus, and also got certificates for third-most in improvements in all three judging categories. And came third in our Division.

I had about 50% participation in Convention Stuff—there is only so much barbershop I can deal with at once—and that was enough for me. Sadly, it wasn't possible to go around Harrogate's lovely shops or visit the RHS garden, but I did have a lovely mid-afternoon lunch/dinner with my gorgeous niece, who is living and working in Harrogate for this year, before she resumes her degree and goes off to Japan for next year!

Beast texted me the horrible news about the knife attack on a train yesterday, and even offered to drive up to Harrogate to bring me home, which I declined. Our train journey home was very calm and straightforward to Peterborough, but Beast was able to drive there and collect the three of us travelling together, thus sparing us the undoubtedly less calm and straightforward bus replacement service, and delivering my travelmates direct to their doorsteps. We then went on to Bun's place to feed her cats and put eyedrops into one of them, then home for a curry and a bit of vegging.

Oi! Tudo bem?

Nascida em 2002, sou assexual, multirromântica, preta, carioca da gema e bastante revoltada com os governos estadual, nacional e mundiais.

Gosto de gatos, cozinhar, gargalhar alto. Gosto, também, de Grand Chase, Seventeen, alta fantasia e não-ficção.

Como todos os outros, sou uma miríade.

Finquei meus pés na blogosfera em 2018, lançando o blog Anotações Esparsas, cujo qual eu viria a coautorar com o Carlos, um colega meu, até eu me retirar da equipe. Como poderá ler no texto: “Com anos de atraso, hoje eu me apresento a vocês”, deixei o AE porque cresci para além dele, embora minha proposta com o EON seja quase idêntica.

Minha proposta de falar de fanfics, fandom e cultura de fãs continuará, porém com a adição positiva de mais de mim. Mais do que escrevo, mais do que penso, e, principalmente, mais do que sou. Por aqui, você, fanfimor, lerá sobre minhas fics, e das releituras que eu fizer, e artigos tratando das opiniões que eu me reprimi compartilhar publicamente por tantos anos.

Como estou adulta — para o meu pavor —, espere por publicação lenta. Minhas prioridades serão minha carreira e minha vida pessoal, então escrever para blog será terciário, por vezes quaternário. Quando o influxo alcançar o estopim, darei as caras por aqui para extravasar um pouco. Não sei escrever demais, e não sei ficar sem escrever. Estranho como são as coisas, não?

No âmbito de escrever e postar fanfics, não tem diferença; escreverei devagar, postarei quase nunca. Dito isso, a feitiçaria que a KOG Studios fez não me deixa sair do fandom, e, por isso, as chances de eu postar uma oneshot ou shortfic são baixas, mas nunca zero. Se eu não estiver fazendo isso, então estou quebrando a cabeça com minha longfic Lass/Elesis — ‘O conto inscrito na lâmina’. Quando der na telha, comento dela por aqui.

Créditos do style